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What is life like under the sea? Is it a dogfish eat dogfish world? Is everyone united for a common porpoise? Or do they all split off in their own special groupers? Well, one tragic story indicates it’s not so perfect down there.
There was once a brilliant sturgeon on the staff of the community health fishility. He was in fact one of it’s flounders. Wiser than salmon, a fin fellow who would never shrimp from his responsibilities, he was successful and happy and always whistled a happy tuna.
One day one of his patients, a mere whipper snapper, started trouting around telling everyone the sturgeon’s treatments had made him more eel than he had been and the conked him with a malpractice suit.
Well, the sturgeon was in a real pickeral. The board chased him off the staff and demanded his oyster. But fortunately the case smelt to high heaven so the judge denied the plaintiff’s clam.
The board tried to hire the sturgeon back but by then he had hit the bottlenose pretty hard. But what’s really shad about the story is that the sturgeon ended up on squid-row…

Q: How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.

Q: What is the worst thing about sex with a blonde?
A: Bucket seats.

A man frantically calls 911 and says, “help…my wife has gone into labor and her contractions are 10 minutes apart”.
911: “is this her first child?”.
Man: “Of course not, you idiot…this is her husband”!

Tombstone Epitaph:

Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York:
Born 1903-Died 1942
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if
the car was on the way down. It was.

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