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A out-of-towner in New York at the height of the tourist season decided to revisit an uptown restaurant he’d enjoyed on a previous trip to the city. Finally catching the eye of an overworked waiter, he said, “You know, it’s been over five years since I first came in here.”

“You’ll have to wait your turn, sir,” replied the harried and now irritated waiter, “I can only serve one table at a time.”

Q: Why do they say ‘Amen’ at the end of a prayer instead of ‘Awomen’?
A: The same reason they sing Hymns instead of Hers!

Q: Why didn’t Noah go fishing?
A: He only had two worms!

Q: When was the longest day in the Bible?
A: The day Adam was created because there was no Eve.

Q: Why did God create man before woman?
A: He didn’t want any advice.

Q: What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A: A roamin’ Catholic!

Doctor: ‘Your recovery was a miracle!’
Patient: ‘PRAISE GOD. Now I don’t have to pay you!’

Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A: Even then men wouldn’t ask for directions!

Why do so few men end up in heaven?
They never stop to ask for directions.

Two cowboys were sitting in a bar when one asked his friend if he had heard of the new sex position called rodeo. His friend says no, what is it?
Well you mount your wife from the back, reach around and cup her breasts with both hands.
Then say, “Boy, those are almost as nice as your sisters”.
Then see if you can hold on for 8 seconds.

A guy was in a bar, and asked for some milk. So in turn a pregnant topless
dancer got on the bar and squeezed the milk out of her tits. He looked at
this and said to himself, “I would hate to see how they give out bloody

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