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How are husbands like lawn mowers?
They’re hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time
they don’t work.

Q: Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
A1: No, big daddy, but hum a few bars and I’ll fake it.
A2: Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen in on the guest list.


Age Fantasy

17 getting to third
25 airplane sex
35 menage a trois
48 taking the company public
66 Swiss maid/Nazi love slave

Q: What do you call an outhouse built on quicksand?
A: Trapper John

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in his shoes. Then
when you do criticize that person, you’ll be a mile away and
have his shoes.

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