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Q: How many WASP Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to get a Tab and one to call Daddy.

The huge black dude was getting ready for the electric chair –
he had been found guilty of rape and murder. The witnesses to
the execution were astonished when the prisoner’s pant leg was
cut and a tiny electrode was prepared to be placed on his penis.
“Hey don’t look so surprised” the condemned man said.
“Yours would shrink and shrivel up too it you were about to be zapped!”

You have just received the “POLISH VIRUS!”
As we don’t have any programming experience,this Virus works on the honor system.
Please delete all the files on your hard drive manually and forward this virus to everyone on your mailing list.
Thanks for your cooperation.

Q: How can you tell if a ghost is flat?
A: Use a spirit level!

The contemplative routine of the convent was being disrupted
by the presence of workmen converting the electrical service
from overhead lines to buried cable. Mother Superior called
the electric company’s complaint department to ask for help.

“The profanity these men use constantly is unsuitable for our
community. You must make them stop cursing so much.”, said
the nun.

“Very well, sister. But you must make allowances for their
habits. Even when they are trying to be tactful, they will still
tend to call a spade a spade.”, said the company

Mother superior then observed, “I think the term they actually
use is ‘fucking shovel'”.

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