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Patient: How much to have this tooth pulled?

Dentist: $100.00.

Patient: $100.00 for just a few minutes work?

Dentist: Well, I can extract it very slowly if you like.

The village blacksmith finally found an apprentice willing to work hard at
low pay for long hours. The blacksmith immediately began his instructions
to the lad, “When I take the shoe out of the fire, I’ll lay it on the
anvil; and when I nod my head, you hit it with this hammer.”
The apprentice did just as he told. Now he’s the village blacksmith.

What’s the difference between a mans paycheck and his dick?
He can always find a girl to blow his paycheck!

The way to a man’s heart is through his feet
(but you need a long knife).

A man walking down the beach, sees a old bottle in the sand and begins to play kick-the-bottle to amuse himself. After a while he picks it up, and a pissed off genie emerges.
She says “normally I grant 3 wishes, but in your case, you son of a bitch, I am going to grant only 1”.
He thinks a minute and says – “OK, I want to wake up with 3 women in my bed”.
She says “So be it!”, and disappears back into the bottle.
Next morning, he wakes up with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding and Hilary Clinton. He has no penis, a broken leg, and no health insurance!

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