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A three- legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.”

This exchange was overheard between the separated sections
of the jail. A male voice yells over to the female side: “I got 12
inches over here you would love to have.”

The female response was: “Well, spit it out it isn’t yours.”

Q: How many Chinese Red Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 10,000 – to give the bulb a cultural revolution.

A motorist, driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened. He then asked what the animal was worth.

“Oh, about $200 today,” said the rancher. “But in six years it would have been worth $900. So $900 is what I’m out.”

The motorist sat down and wrote out a check and handed it to the farmer.

“Here,” he said, “is the check for $900. It’s postdated six years from now.”

Q: What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho Cheese.



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