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Computer science student is studying under a tree and another one pulls up on a flashy new bike The student under the tree asks, “Where’d you get that?!?” The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, this girl pulls up on her bike… She takes off all her clothes and says to me, ‘You can have anything you want’.” The other student responds, “Good choice! — her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”

This is a passenger announcement.

The train on platform one, two, three, four, five, six, seven,
eight, nine, ten, eleven and twelve has come in sideways.

A greenhorn visiting Alaska was talking to two old sourdoughs. They informed him he was a cheechako. The greenhorn asked how he could become a sourdough.
The two sourdoughs winked at each other, and told him he had to do three things. First, he had to pee in the Yukon River. Second, he had to wrestle with a grizzly bear. And last, he had to make love to an Athabascan Indian woman.
“No problem,” said the cheechako, and off he went. He hired himself a guide, and soon had dispatched his first duty. Then they found the grizzly bear.
The cheechako chased the bear into a cave. The most awful roaring and screaming emitted from that cave, along with blood and fur.
Finally, the cheechako staggers out of the cave. “Okay,” he said to the guide. “Where’s that Indian woman I’m supposed to wrassle!”

Dear John,
I have been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement.
Won’t you fogive and forget? Your absence is breaking my heart.
I was a fool, nobody can take your place. I love you.

All my love,

Belinda.

PS Congratulations on winning this week’s lottery.

“…And the halftime score here at the Colleusium is Lions 7,
Christians Nothing. We’ll be right back after these messages…”



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