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An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him.

He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, a pessimist by nature, and invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. They fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet.

The friend saw everything but did not say a single word.

On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, “Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?”

I sure did,” responded his friend. “He can’t swim.

Two men went hunting. Joe had been hunting all his life, but Steve was hunting for the first time. Joe told Steve to sit down and not make a sound. So he did.

But when Joe got 100 yards away, he heard a scream. “I thought I told you to be quiet!” he said.

“Well, I was when the snake bit me,” said Steve. “And I was when the bear attacked me… but when the two chipmunks crawled up my pant leg and said, ‘Should we eat them or take them with us,’ I screamed.”

Two guys go hunting. Jerry has never gone hunting while Joe has hunted all his life.
When they get to the northern Wisconsin woods, Joe tells Jerry to sit by a tree and not make a sound while Joe checks out a deer stand. After he gets about a quarter of a mile away, Joe hears a blood- curdling scream.
He rushes back to Jerry and yells, “I thought I told you to be quiet!”
Jerry says, “Hey, I tried. I really did. When those snakes crawled over me, I didn’t make a sound. When that bear was breathing down my neck, I didn’t make a peep. But when those two chipmunks crawled up my pants leg and said, Should we take them with us or eat them here? I couldn’t keep quiet any more!”

Two guys were out hunting, but they weren’t getting any ducks.
“What do you think the problem is?” one man asked his companion.
“I dunno,” came the reply, “Maybe we aren’t throwing the dog up high enough.”

Two men went hunting. Joe had been hunting all his life, but Steve was hunting for the first time. Joe told Steve to sit down and not make a sound. So he did.
But when Joe got 100 yards away, he heard a scream. “I thought I told you to be quiet!” he said.
“Well, I was when the snake bit me,” said Steve. “And I was when the bear attacked me… but when the two chipmunks crawled up my pant leg and said, ‘Should we eat them or take them with us,’ I screamed.”



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