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Q: Which of the following doesn’t belong?
A:
(a) meat
(b) eggs
(c) wife
(d) blow job

(D) A blowjob because its possible to beat your meat, your eggs or your wife, but you can’t beat a blowjob

Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton on a recent flight.
After the plane was airborne, the flight attendant came around for drink
orders.

The President asked for a whisky & soda, which was brought and placed
before him. The attendant then asked the minister if he would also like
drink.
The minister replied in disgust, “Ma’am, I’d rather be savagely raped by
a brazen whore than let liquor touch these lips!”

The President then handed his drink back to the attendant and said,
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know there was a choice… “

Two cuties were comparing notes concerning their latest boyfriends.

The first said, “He took me to his condo in Ocean City and showed me all these expensive jewels. There was an emerald-cut diamond of at least five carats, a tennis bracelet of six carats, and even a wrist watch with eleven carats.”

“Impressive.” said the second young thing.

“Well… yes.” the first agreed. “But the downside was that with all those carats, he expected me to behave like a rabbit.”

One day this old man was about to have sex with a young girl which he did
not know. The old man began to put on his condom when the young girl asked
him why is he putting one on. She said “you don’t have to worry about
getting me pregnant because you are too old and you don’t have to worry
about catching anything because you are going to die pretty soon anyway”.
The old man continued to put on his condom he then looked up at the girl
and said, “young girl the reason I am putting on this condom isn’t because
I am afraid of getting you pregnant or catching anything. I just like the
scent of burning rubber.”

One summer a few years ago, a middle age French-Canadian man named Jacques decided to vacation on the coast of Maine. While soaking up some sun on the beach, a very pretty girl caught his eye and his sexual desires.

He immediately got up, ran to her, grabbed her by the hand and brought her to his hotel room. There he had sex with her and then sent the young lady on her way.

She immediately reported this to the police and Jacques was arrested.

On his court date the judge asked him if he understood the nature of the crime he committed against the young lady.

Jacques looked at the judge with a bewildered look and said, “Non! Hi don’t understand! Hin my country you grab de pretty girl, bring her to de hotel room, BOOM-BOOM, give hit to her den let her go! Hit’s O.K.!”

“Sir,” the judge said, “in THIS country if you are to have sex with a lady, you must have her permission first, or it is considered rape. You must have her consent!”

After hearing this, Jacques turned around and mysteriously looked at the judge and exclaimed, “Cuntscent! Hi got her cuntscent! Hi got her cuntscent on my fingers, cuntscent on my mustache, hi got her cuntscent everywhere!”



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