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A woman went to her doctor for advice. She told him that her husband had developed a penchant for anal sex, and she was not sure that it was such a good idea.
The doctor asked, “Do you enjoy it?”
She said that she did.
He asked, “Does it hurt you?”
She said that it didn’t.
The doctor then told her, “Well, then, there’s no reason that you shouldn’t practice anal sex, if that’s what you like, so long as you take care not to get pregnant.”
The woman was mystified. She asked “You can get pregnant from anal sex?”
The doctor replied, “Of course. Where do you think attorneys come from?”

Over drinks one afternoon a buddy of mine and I were discussing former “loves.” I told him that I once broke-up with a girl long ago because she had a seemingly incurable speech impediment.

George said, “Jimmy, I’m shocked. I never know you to be one to be prejudiced against handicaps. What was the girl’s problem?”

Taking a sip, I paused and reflected. “She couldn’t say ‘yes’.”

Q: Who makes more money a drug dealer or a hooker?
A: A hooker because she can wash her crack and reuse it.

A bikini is the closest thing to a barbed-wire fence…it protects the property without obstructing any of the view.

Q: How does a blond turn the light on in the morning?

A: Open the car door.

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