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Q: Why is the brunette considered an evil color?
A: When was the last time you saw a blonde witch?

Q: What’s the new and politically correct name for Lesbian?
A: Vagitarian.

A young dating couple were driving down the road in a very busy area, when things started to get some what passionate. So they decided to pull over and park and have some fun. Things were really getting hot,and they were not paying any attention to what was going on outside. All of a sudden a policeman was tapping on their window.

The cop could hardly contain himself. “Didn’t you know that you are not supposed to be having sex in public?” he asked the couple.

Being embarrassed at being caught, they said yes and apologized.

“Well, he said, I will have to write you a ticket.” So the cop wrote the ticket and reminded them next time to watch their behavior.

After getting dressed the girlfriend asked her boyfriend what the policeman wrote the ticket for.

He responded, “Doing 69 in a 35 mph speed zone!”

Q: Why are women like snow flakes?
They are all beautiful.
They are all different.
They can all be cold as ice.
But they’ll all melt when they land on your face…

One night a man heard howls coming from his basement and went down to discover a female cat being raped by a mouse. Fascinated by what he saw, the man gained the mouse’s confidence with some cheese and then took him next door.
The mouse repeated his amazing performance by raping a German Sheppard.
The man, very excited by this, was dying to show someone his discovery. He rushed home and woke up his wife but before he could explain, she saw the mouse, screamed, and covered her head with the blanket.
“Don’t be afraid, darling,” said the man. “Wait until I tell you about this.”
“Get out of here!” cried his wife. “And take that sex maniac with you!”

© 2015