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Condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have sex again.

Two storks on a nest, a father stork and baby stork. Baby is crying and
crying and father stork is trying to calm him. “Don’t worry Son, your
mother will come back. She’s only bringing people babies and making them happy.”
The next night, its fathers turn to do the job.
“Son, your father will be back as soon as possible, but now he’s bringing
joy to new mommies and daddies.”
A few days later, the stork parents are desperate, their son is gone from
the nest all night. Finally, shortly before dawn, he returns and the
parents ask their son where he had been all night.
Says the baby stork, “Awww, just scaring the shit out of college kids!”

A woman works in an office setting. Every morning a man she works with comes in and sticks his nose in her hair, backs away and exclaims, “Boy, your hair smells GREAT!”

This became a regular occurrence, and began to annoy the woman. Day after day this went on. Finally she decided to report him to the Director of Human resources. She said to him, “I would like to file a sexual harassment charge!”

“What do you base this on?” replied the HR Manager.

“Well, you see, every morning a man I work with comes in and sticks his nose in my hair, backs away and exclaims ‘Boy, your hair smells GREAT!'”

“I’m afraid that this doesn’t sound like much of a case,” said the HR.

“Well, would it bolster my case if you knew the guy was a midget?” retorted the woman.

A cucumber and a pickle are having a conversation and the pickle says to the cucumber, “You know my life really sucks. Whenever I get big, fat and juicy they sprinkle seasonings over me and stick me in a jar.”

So the cucumber says, “Yeah, you think that’s bad … whenever I get big, fat and juicy they slice me up and they put me over salad.”

So this penis is walking by and overhears their conversation and says, “You think that your life is tough? Whenever I get big, fat and juicy, they put a plastic bag over my head, stick me in a dark smelly room and make me do push ups until I throw up!”

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor said, “We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks.”

The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The pastor went to the elderly couple and asked, “Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?”

The old man replied, “No problem at all, Pastor.”

“Congratulations! Welcome to the church!” said the pastor.

The pastor went to the middle-aged couple and asked, “Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?”

The man replied, “The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes, we made it.”

“Congratulations! Welcome to the church!” said the pastor.

The pastor then went to the newlywed couple and asked, “Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?”

“No Pastor, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks,” the young man replied sadly.

“What happened?” inquired the pastor.

“My wife was reaching for a can of paint on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there.”

“You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church,” stated the pastor.

“We know,” said the young man, “We’re not welcome at Home Depot anymore either.”



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