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Q: What’s the fastest way to get a nun pregnant?
A: Dress her up as an altar boy.

The divorce court was attentive as the wealthy Yuppette complained to
the Judge that her husband had left her bed and board.

When she had finished, the husband’s lawyer rose to his feet and
coolly replied, “Your Honor, I have a slight correction in the typing
of the charging documents. My client claims that he left her bed
‘bored’.”

Q: What’s the difference between a computer and a blonde?

A: The computer is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on.

A little boy and girl at school having lunch in the shelter shed.

“Tommy,” she said, “I’m not eating any more chicken sandwiches.”

“Why?” he asked.

“Cause I’m starting to grow feathers down here,” she said, pointing to the bottom of her tummy.

“I don’t believe you!” he said. “You’ll have to show me.”

Behind the shed they went, where the inspection took place.

“Gee, you’re right,” he said. “I’ve been eating a lot of chicken, perhaps I’m getting feathers too.”

“Well, I’d better have a look,” she said.

After a lengthy examination, she looked up and said, “Oh, I think it’s too late for you, you’ve got the neck and giblets too!”

Q: Why are brunette jokes one-liners?
A1: So blondes can remember them.
A2: Because it would hurt a blonde’s brain to think of a longer one.



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