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Near 50 percent of all marriages in the United States end in divorce. Most of the time the cause is something as vague as “irreconcilable differences.” But sometimes the
reasons for divorcing are more specific. Here are some examples:

A man in Tarittville, Connecticut, filed for divorce because his wife left him a note on the refrigerator, which read: “I won’t be home when you return from work. Have gone to the bridge club. There’ll be a recipe for your dinner at 7 o’clock on Channel 2.”

A man in Hazard, Kentucky, divorced his wife because she “beat him whenever he removed onions from his hamburger without first asking for permission.”

The South Dakota Supreme Court upheld a divorce court ruling in September 1994, citing the husband as the cause of the couple’s troubles. The husband had, among other bad habits, a tendency of passing gas around the house and then getting angry with his wife when she complained. The wife claimed her husband could easily regulate his
odoriferous emissions and would break wind as a “retaliation thing.”

A man in Long Island filed for divorce against his wife claiming that she is a witch and routinely practices ritualistic animal sacrifices.

A deaf man in Bennettsville, South Carolina, filed for divorce because his wife “was always nagging him in sign language.”

A woman in Canon City, Colorado, divorced her husband because he forced her to “duck under the dashboard whenever they drove past his girlfriend’s house.”

A woman in Hardwick, Georgia, divorced her husband on the grounds that he “stayed home too much and was much too affectionate.

Teacher Jack Fesneau refused to speak to his wife Christina for more than two years because of the way she said, “I do” at their wedding. Christina, from Quebec, Canada, has been granted a divorce.

A Judge granted a divorce to Percy Quentin because his wife Thelma organized a lottery – with herself as the prize. After selling 600 tickets at US$5 each in Los Angeles, US, the winner was a 73-year-old man.

When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at its intended victim during a holdup in Long Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder: He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again.
This time it worked.

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine out and lost a finger.
The chef’s claim was approved.

A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space.
Understandably, he shot her.

After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus-stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.
The deception wasn’t discovered for 3 days.

An American teenager was taken to hospital to recover from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked ! how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

There was a snake called Nate. His purpose in life was to stay in the desert and guard the lever. Theis lever was no ordinary lever. It was the lever that if moved would destroy the world. Nate took his job very seriously. He let nothing get close to the lever.

One day off in the distance he saw a cloud of dust. He kept his eye on it because he was guarding the lever. The dust cloud continued to move closer to the lever. Nate saw that it was a huge boulder and it was heading straight for the lever!

Nate thought about what he could do to save the world. He decided if he could get in front of the boulder he could deflect it and it would miss the lever. Nate slithered quickly to intersect the boulder. The boulder ran over Nate, but it was, in fact, deflected, leaving history to conclude that is was better Nate than lever.

© 2015