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Q. Why did they build the Mercedes plant so close to the University of Alabama?
A. Because they have an endless supply of crash test dummies right down the road.

Q: How many Bell Labs Vice Presidents does it take to change a light bulb?
A1: That’s proprietary information. Answer available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
A2: Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
A3: Three. One to get the bulb and two to get the phone number of one of their subordinates to actually change it.

Q: What’s the difference between a flutist and a Rolls Royce?
A: Most musician have never been in a Rolls Royce.

Q: Why did the skeleton burp?

A: Because it didn’t have the guts to fart.

Q: How can you stop milk from turning sour?

A: Leave it in the cow.

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