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Q: How many archaeologists does does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Three. One to change it and two to argue about how old the old one is.

Q: How many members of the U.S.S. Enterprise does it take to change a light bulb?

A: 7. Scotty will report to Captain Kirk that the light bulb in the Engineering Section is burnt out, to which
Kirk will send Bones to pronounce the bulb dead. Scotty, after checking around, notices that they have no more new light
bulbs, and complains that he can’t see in the dark to tend to his engines. Kirk must make an emergency stop at the next
uncharted planet, Alpha Regula IV, to procure a light bulb from the natives. Kirk, Spock, Bones, Sulu, and 3 red shirt
security officers beam down. The 3 security officers are promptly killed by the natives, and the rest of the landing
party is captured. Meanwhile, back in orbit, Scotty notices a Klingon ship approaching and must warp out of orbit to
escape detection. Bones cures the native king who is suffering from the flu, and as a reward the landing party is set
free and given all of the light bulbs they can carry. Scotty cripples the Klingon ship and warps back to the planet
just in time to beam up Kirk et. al. The new bulb is inserted, and the Enterprise continues with its five year mission.

Q: How many Russian leaders does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Nobody knows. Russian leaders don’t last as long as light bulbs.

Q: How many sorority sisters does it take to change a light bulb?
A1: 51. One to change the bulb, and fifty to sing about the bulb being changed.
A2: 10. One to change the bulb and nine to make t-shirts about it.

Q: How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Doesn’t the stage manager do that?



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