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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: BILL CLINTON: Let me say this one more time. I did not have sexual relations with that chicken.

Former Vice President Quayle, Speaker of the House
Gingrich, and President Clinton are traveling in a
car together in Kansas. A tornado comes along and
whirls them up into the air and tosses them thousands
of yards away. They all fall into a daze.

When they come to and extract themselves from the
vehicle, they realize they’re in the fabled Land of Oz.

They decide to go see the famous Wizard of Oz. The
Wizard is known for granting people their wishes.

Quayle says, “I’m going to ask the Wizard for a brain.”
Gingrich responds, “I’m going to ask the Wizard for a heart.”
Clinton speaks up, “Where’s Dorothy?”

1. Husseinfeld

2. Mad About Everything

3. Allah McBeal

4. Wheel of Terror

5. Achmed’s Creek

6. The Price is Right if Saddam Says It’s Right

7. Children Are Forbidden From Saying Anything Darndest

8. The Brian Benben Bin Laden Show

9. Buffy the Zionist American Dog Slayer

10. Suddenly Sanctions

During the Republican primaries, George W. Bush spent his campaign money at a rate of $200,000 a day and broke Bob Dole’s record for most money spent on an entire presidential campaign. He’s spending money so fast, a national organization of scorned women has made him an honorary ex-wife.

A member of the Senate, known for his hot temper and acid tongue, explodes one day in mid-session and begins to shout, “Half of this Senate is made up of cowards and corrupt politicians!”

All the other Senators plead to the angry member that he withdraw his statement, or be removed from the remainder of the session. After a long pause, the angry member accepted.

“Ok,” he said, “I withdraw what I said. Half of this Senate is NOT made up of cowards and corrupt politicians!”



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