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A guy is sitting at a bar and orders a drink. At the same time the TV go’s
on and there is Bill Clinton about to give a speech. The man yells,
“There’s a horses ass”
A guy gets up and punches him.. And the man left.. Then when Hilary
Clinton came on he said the same, “There’s a horses ASS…”
He then got punched again.. So he says to the bartender, “What is this, a
Clinton country?” The bartender says “no, Horse country”

George W Bush, Dick Cheny and Bush’s mama, Barbara, are having a holiday at the North Pole. George W weighs … Well, we know how light he is. Cheny weighs so much, and Miss Barabara, well, we won’t mention a lady’s weight. One day, the three of them are having a trip on a sleigh.

Suddenly, they see a polar bear behind them. Quickly, they throw out all the luggage behind them, but this doesn’t help: the bear comes closer.

They realise that one of the three will have to sacrifice himself or herself so that the two others will be able to escape.

“You should do it”, George W. says to Cheny, “The bear will need more time to eat you then to eat me. We can’t expect Mama, here, to fight the bear.”

“I guess you’re right”, Cheny says. As he jumps out of the sleigh, he shouts, “For the G-O-P!”, and gets killed by the bear.

“Thank God for my brains”, George W. says, smirks. But, the bear reopens the chase.

“Now it’s your time, mama”, George W. says. “Your weight is bigger than mine and a good mama sacrifices herself for her childern.”

“George!” G. W’s mama says.

G.W. stands his ground, rather stares back, coolly, and very hard.

His mama shakes every hair of her white head, the color that George W. told us he put there. “I guess you’re right”, she says, and she also jumps out and gets killed.

“Thank God for my brains”, George W. giggles.

But still the bear won’t stop hunting the sleigh. George W. really gets mad, and he shouts out : “You stupid animal!! Just wait a minute!! I’ll take my gun and I’ll blow you to pieces!!”

Most people worry about getting AIDS from SEX.
Bill worries about getting SEX from AIDES!

One day Clinton goes to the bathroom, pulls down his pants,
and much to his amazement, he finds a red ring around his
penis. So the next day he goes to his physician and the doctor
says, “I cant figure out what it is. So I’ll give you some
medicine, and if it doesn’t work, come back. Ill give you
something else.” So clinton takes the perscription and takes the
pills as directed and comes back in 2 weeks. The physician
then hands him a different prescription and he comes back in
3 weeks this time. Then, instead of giving him a prescription
he gives him a small tube-like capsule. The doctor says,”Rub this
around the offending circle and come back tomorrow. Clinton
returns the next day and starts shouting, “Wow! That stuff was
terriffic doc! What was thast concoction? It worked great!”
The doctor then calmly replied; Lipstick remover.

FLORIDA – In a satirical protest against the political establishment, Percy the dog is running for congress in Florda against Secretary of State Katherine Harris.

Percy’s owner, Wayne Genthner, is acting as the dog’s campaign manager.

Percy, a border collie mix, will be a write-in candidate in the Republican primary, has his own website, and has even been out to meet voters.

Genthner acknowledges that no one actually expects the dog to be elected, “but plenty of people will be willing to vote for a dog to represent their discontent with the political system,” he said.

Percy’s website states, “Percy, District 13′s only black white candidate, fluent in Spanish, is a strong believer in cross culture, cross species interface, and has vowed, if elected, to support programs that foment these ideals.”

In addition, Percy promises to literally chase down any criminals he sees.

© 2015