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WITCH = William In Trouble, Call Hillary.

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, “Ribbit 9 Iron”.

“The man looks around and doesn’t see anyone. Again, he hears, “Ribbit 9 Iron.”

He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts the club away, and grabs a 9 iron. Boom! He hits it 10 inches from the cup.

He is shocked. He says to the frog, “Wow, that’s amazing!You must be a lucky frog, eh?”

The frog replies, “Ribbit Lucky frog.”

The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole.”What do you think, frog?” the man asks.

“Ribbit 3 wood.”

The guy takes out a 3 wood and, Boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn’t know what to say. By the end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, “Okay, where to next?”

The frog replies, “Ribbit Las Vegas.”

They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, “Okay, frog, now what?”

The frog says, “Ribbit Roulette.”

Upon approaching the roulette table, the man asks, “What do you think I should bet?”

The frog replies, “Ribbit $3000, black 6.”

Now, this should be a million-to-one shot to win, but after the golf game, the man figures what the heck.

Boom! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table.The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, “Frog, I don’t know how to repay you.You’ve won me all this money and I am forever grateful.

“The frog replies, “Ribbit Kiss Me.”

He figures why not, since after all the frog did for him, he deserves it. With a kiss, the frog turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl.”

And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room. So help me God or my name is not William Jefferson Clinton.

Bob Dole, Dan Quayle, and Bill Clinton all get sucked up by a tornado (or is that tornadoe – sorry for the Dan Quayle humor) and deposited safely in the Land of Oz.

Due to being disoriented, they look around and wander aimlessly for a few minutes before they figure out where they are (the yellow-brick road and all).

Bob Dole says, “Seeing as how we’re in Oz, I’m going to the Wizard and ask for a heart.”

Dan Quayle replies, ” I’ll go with you and I’ll ask the Wizard for a brain.”

Bill Clinton looks around a little more and says, “I wonder where Dorothy is?”

Bill Clinton is visiting a school. In one class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a “tragedy.”
One little boy stands up and offers, “If my best friend who lives next door was playing in the street when a car came along and killed him, that would be a tragedy.”
“No,” Clinton says, “That would be an ACCIDENT.”
A girl raises her hand. “If a school bus carrying fifty children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved… that would be a tragedy.”
“I’m afraid not,” explains Clinton. “That is what we would call a GREAT LOSS.”
The room is silent; none of the other children volunteer.
“What?” asks Clinton, “Isn’t there any one here who can give me an example of a tragedy?”
Finally, a boy in the back raises his hand. In a timid voice, he says: “If an airplane carrying Bill & Hillary Clinton were blown up by a bomb, THAT would be a tragedy.”
“Wonderful!” Clinton beams. “Marvelous! And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?”
“Well,” says the boy, “because it wouldn’t be an accident, and it certainly would not be a great loss!”

The Clinton’s were in a terrible plane crash and all three died.

When they got to heaven, they approached the Throne of God and God said to Chelsea, “Why should I let you into heaven?”

Chelsea answered, “I am the daughter of the President, a representative of all the children in America.”

God said, “Very well, you may sit on my right side.”

Then he said to Bill, “Why should I let you into heaven?”

Bill answered, “I am the President of the United States, a representative of all the people in America.” God said, “Very well, you may sit on my left side.”

Then he said to Hillary, “Why should I let you into heaven?”

Hillary answered, “I don’t know, but you’re in my seat!”

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