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Q: What do you see when you look up an alto’s dress?

A: A tenor.

Q: What’s the difference between God and a conductor?
A: God knows He’s not a conductor.

This guy unexpectedly got the day off and decided he would
spend it on the golf course. After arriving at the club house,
he was told that the only way he could play today was if he
was willing to play along with three nuns.
He agreed and set off with the nuns in tow. At the first hole
he said, after you, and the nuns insisted that he go first.
He took a giant swing and sliced it into a nearby bunker.
“Goddammit!” he said.
“Oh, my, please refrain from using that kind of language
around us.” said the nun.
“I’m so sorry, ma’am, it won’t happen again.”
The nun gets up to the tee and her ball travels about twenty
yards, hits a tree, and bounces back behind them.
“Well shit, Goddamn, hell, fuck!” exclaims the nun.
“Hey, what did you tell me about that?” asks the man.
“Yeah, well, you didn’t hit a fuckin’ tree.”

Q: How has French revolution affected world economic growth?
A: Too early to say.

Q: How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Fifty. One to do it and the others to stand around and say, “I could do that better.



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