Joke's Database
Have fun searching 100254 jokes and pictures!

This question was raised on a Philly radio call-in show. Without casting stones, it is a legitimate question. There are two men, both extremely wealthy. One develops relatively cheap software and gives billions of dollars to charity. The other sponsors terrorism. That being the case, why is it that the Clinton Administration spent more money chasing down Bill Gates over the past eight years than Osama bin Laden?

It is a strange turn of events. Hillary gets $8 Million for her forthcoming memoir. Bill gets about $12 Million for his memoir yet to be written. This from two people who have spent the past eight years being unable to recall anything about past events while under oath!

Gold Star Mothers is an organization made up of women whose sons were killed in military combat during service in the United States armed forces. Recently a delegation of New York State Gold Star Mothers made a trip to Washington, DC to discuss various concerns with their elected representatives. According to there was only one politician in DC who refused to meet with these ladies. Can you guess which politician that might be? Was it New York Senator Charles Schumer? Nope, he met with them. Try again. Do you know anyone serving in the Senate who has ever had anything but contempt for our military? Do you happen to know the name of any politician in Washington whose husband once wrote of his loathing of the military? Now you’re getting warm! You got it! None other than Hillary Clinton. She refused repeated requests to meet with the Gold Star Mothers. Now — please don’t tell me you’re surprised. This woman wants to be President of the United States — and there is a huge percentage of uninformed voters who are eager to help her achieve that.

OK, we all know that 666 is the Number of the Beast.

But did you know that:

660 – Approximate number of the Beast
DCLXVI – Roman numeral of the Beast
666.0000 – Number of the High Precision Beast
0.666 – Number of the Millibeast
/ 666 – Beast Common Denominator
666 ^ (-1) – Imaginary number of the Beast
1010011010 – Binary of the Beast
6, uh… what was that number again?
– Number of the Blonde Beast
1-666 – Area code of the Beast
00666 – Zip code of the Beast
1-900-666-0666: – Live Beasts! One-on-one pacts! Call Now!
Only $6.66/minute. Over 18 only please.
$665.95 – Retail price of the Beast
$699.25 – Price of the Beast plus 5% state sales tax
$769.95 – Price of the Beast with all accessories and
replacement soul
$656.66 – Walmart price of the Beast
$646.66 – Next week’s Walmart price of the Beast
Phillips 666 – Gasoline of the Beast
Route 666 – Way of the Beast
666 F – Oven temperature for roast Beast
666k – Retirement plan of the Beast
666 mg – Recommended Minimum Daily Requirement of Beast
6.66 % – 5 year CD interest rate at First Beast of Hell
National Bank, $666 minimum deposit.
Lotus 6-6-6 – Spreadsheet of the Beast
Word 6.66 – Word Processor of the Beast
i66686 – CPU of the Beast
666i – BMW of the Beast
DSM-666 (revised)
– Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the Beast
668 – Next-door neighbor of the Beast

Q: How can you tell when a salesperson is lying?

A: His lips are moving

Boris Yeltsin, Bill Clinton & Ernesto Zedillo (Mexican President) are in France in a restaurant.

The waiter asks “le apperitif?”

All of them answer “oui!”

The waiter looks at Zedillo “Le tequila?”
Zedillo: “oui!”

The waiter looks at Yeltsin “Le vodka?”
Yeltsin: “oui!”

Finally, the waiter looks at Clinton ” Le whisky?”

A wealthy Democrat had a summer house in the Maine woods. Each summer he’d invite a different friend (no, that’s not the punch line) to spend a week or two. On one occasion, he invited a Czechoslovakian to stay with him. They had a splendid time in the country – rising early and living in the great outdoors. Early one morning they went out to pick berries for their morning breakfast. As they went around the berry patch along came two huge bears. The Democrat dashed for cover. His friend wasn’t so lucky and the male bear reached him and swallowed him whole. The Democrat ran back to his car, drove to town as fast has he could, and got the sheriff. The sheriff grabbed his rifle and dashed back to the berry patch with the Democrat. Sure enough, both bears were still there. “He’s in THAT one!” cried the Democrat, pointing to the male. The sheriff looked at the bears, and without batting an eye, leveled his gun, took careful aim, and SHOT THE FEMALE.
“Whatd’ya do that for?!” exclaimed the Democrat, “I said he was in the other!” “Yep,” said the sheriff, “and would YOU believe a Democrat who told you that the Czech was in the Male?”

© 2015