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Q: What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A: A pair of Re-bachs.

Q: What’s the difference between a dressmaker and an alto?
A: The dressmaker tucks up the frills.

What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians?

A drummer.

Micheal Caine goes up to Milton Berle during a party and asks, “What kind of cigar are you smoking there?” “It’s a Lawrence Welk.” says Milton. “What’s a Lawrence Welk?” Micheal asks. Milton says “It’s a piece of crap with a band wrapped around it.”

Q: Why are orchestra intermissions limited to 20 minutes?

A: So you don’t have to retrain the cellists.

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