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Q: Why did the Boy Scout take up the banjo?

A: They make good paddles.

Top Ten Uses For Tubas ~

10. A musical instrument.

9. A floatation device.

8. Something flute players can’t keep their hands off.

7. A mirror.

6. Punishment. (freshmen + Kieth carry heavy tubas all year)

5. A battering ram

4. A chair.

3. Babe Magnet

2. Trash Can (freshmen + Kieth’s tubas)

1. Storage Container for music, field show charts, soda, food, tools, towels, and koosh balls!!

Once there was a viola player who was second chair in the Winnipeg Symphony. He met a genie, who promised him three wishes. For his first wish he asked to be a better musician, and he became first chair. For his second wish, he asked to be an even better musician, and he became first viola in the Berlin Symphony. For his third wish, he wished to be an even better musician, and he ended up playing second violin in the Winnipeg Symphony.

Q: What happens if you sing country music backwards?

A: You get your job and your wife back.

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