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A man decided that he was going to ride a 10-speed bike from Phoenix to Flagstaff. He got as far as Black Canyon City before the mountains became too much and he could go no farther.

So he stuck his thumb out and after 3 hours hadn’t gotten a single person to stop. Finally, a guy in a Corvette pulled over and offered him a ride.

Of course, the bike wouldn’t fit in the car. The owner of the Corvette found a piece of rope lying by the highway and tied it to his bumper. He tied the other end to the bike and told the man that if he was going too fast, to honk the horn on his bike and that he would slow down.

Everything went fine for the first 30 miles.

Suddenly, another Corvette blew past them. Not to be outdone, the Corvette pulling the bike took off after the other. A short distance down the road, the Corvettes, both going well over 120 mph, blew through a speed trap.

The police officer noted the speeds from his radar gun and radio’d ahead to the other officer that he had two Corvettes headed his way at over 120 mph.

He then relayed, “…and you’re not going to believe this, but there’s a guy on a 10-speed bike honking to pass.”

A man decided that he was going to ride a 10-speed bike from Phoenix to Flagstaff. He got as far as Black Canyon City before the mountains became too much and he could go no farther.

So he stuck his thumb out and after 3 hours hadn’t gotten a single person to stop. Finally, a guy in a Corvette pulled over and offered him a ride.

Of course, the bike wouldn’t fit in the car. The owner of the Corvette found a piece of rope lying by the highway and tied it to his bumper. He tied the other end to the bike and told the man that if he was going too fast, to honk the horn on his bike and that he would slow down.

Everything went fine for the first 30 miles.

Suddenly, another Corvette blew past them. Not to be outdone, the Corvette pulling the bike took off after the other. A short distance down the road, the Corvettes, both going well over 120 mph, blew through a speed trap.

The police officer noted the speeds from his radar gun and radio’d ahead to the other officer that he had two Corvettes headed his way at over 120 mph.

He then relayed, “…and you’re not going to believe this, but there’s a guy on a 10-speed bike honking to pass.”

A man driving on the highway is pulled up by a police officer on a bike. The officer says, “Pull over”, and the driver pulls over to the side of the road.

He says, “I’m sorry, officer, was I speeding?”.

The police officer says, “No, mate, but your wife fell out of the car a mile back.”

The man replies, “Oh, that explains it. I thought I was going deaf.”

Auntie Em. Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy.

We’re staying together for the sake of the cats.

It’s been lovely, but I have to scream now.

My karma ran over your dogma.

Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

This is not an abandoned vehicle.

I don’t lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily.

Beautify Texas. Put a Yankee on a bus.

Welcome to Texas, now go home.

It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you.

If you don’t like the news, go out and make some of your own.

Life’s too short to dance with ugly men.

Life’s too short to dance with ugly women.

My wife says if I go fishing one more time, she’s going to leave me … Gosh, I’m going to miss her.

When you do a good deed get a receipt (in case heaven is like the IRS).

I is a college student.

Beer isn’t just for breakfast any more.

Sorry, I don’t date outside my species.

Will Rogers never met a lawyer.

Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law’s face on the back of a milk carton.

So, you think a gallon of gasoline is expensive…??

* Diet Snapple 16oz for $1.29 = $10.32 per gallon

* Lipton Ice Tea 16oz for $1.19 = $9.52 per gallon

* Gatorade 20oz for $1.59 = $10.17 per gallon

* Ocean Spray 16oz for $1.25 = $10.00 per gallon

* Pint of milk 16oz for $1.59 = $12.72 per gallon

* STP Brake Fluid 12oz for $3.15 = $33.60 per gallon

* Vick’s Nyquil 6oz for $8.35 = $178.13 per gallon

* Pepto Bismol 4oz for $3.85 = $123.20 per gallon

* Whiteout 7oz for $1.39 = $25.42 per gallon

* Scope 1.5oz for $0.99 = $84.48 per gallon

And this is the REAL KICKER…

* Evian water 9oz for $1.49 = $ 21.19 per gallon
$21.19 FOR WATER!!

So next time you’re at the pump, be glad your car doesn’t run on Nyquil or Scope, Whiteout or water!!!



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