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I once knew a couple who were in the iron adn steel business – she did the ironing, while he went out stealing.

The owner of a large factory decided to make a surprise
visit and check up on his staff. Walking though the plant, he
noticed a young man leaning lazily against a post.
“Just how much are you being paid a week?” said the owner

“Three hundred bucks,” replied the young man.

Taking out a fold of bills from his wallet, the owner
counted out $300, slapped the money into the boy’s hands, and
said “Here’s a week’s pay — now get out and don’t come

Turning to one of the supervisors, he said “How long has
that lazy bum been working here anyway?”

“He doesn’t work here,” said the supervisor. “He was just
here to deliver a pizza!”

An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so he asks the concierge at his hotel if there’s any place around where he can get American food.
The concierge tells him he’s in luck, there’s a pizza place that just opened, and they deliver. The concierge gives the businessman the phone number, and he goes back to his room and orders a pizza.
Thirty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up to the door with the pizza.
The businessman takes the pizza, and starts sneezing uncontrollably. He asks the delivery man, “What the heck did you put on this pizza?”
The delivery man bows deeply and says, “We put on the pizza what you ordered: pepper only.”

I’m always delighted when people stick their noses in my business – my company makes paper tissues.

Senior Manager Style

Senior managers set broad elephant hunting policy based on the assumption that elephants are just like field mice, but with deeper voices.

QA Style

Quality assurance inspectors ignore the elephants and look for mistakes the other hunters made when they were packing the Jeep.

Sales Style

Salespeople don’t hunt elephants but spend their time selling elephants they haven’t caught, for delivery two days before the season opens. Software salespeople ship the first thing they catch and write up an invoice for an elephant. Hardware salespeople catch rabbits, paint them gray and sell them as “desktop elephants.”

© 2015