Joke's Database
     
Have fun searching 100181 jokes and pictures!


Some cows view each day as the last roundup, others, merely as another opportunity to stampede.
Most cows view the new day as an exciting new opportunity to eat grass and point in the same direction as the other cows.

Senior Manager Style

Senior managers set broad elephant hunting policy based on the assumption that elephants are just like field mice, but with deeper voices.

QA Style

Quality assurance inspectors ignore the elephants and look for mistakes the other hunters made when they were packing the Jeep.

Sales Style

Salespeople don’t hunt elephants but spend their time selling elephants they haven’t caught, for delivery two days before the season opens. Software salespeople ship the first thing they catch and write up an invoice for an elephant. Hardware salespeople catch rabbits, paint them gray and sell them as “desktop elephants.”

One afternoon, a man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. “Why are you eating grass?” he asked one man.
“We don’t have any money for food,” the poor man replied.
“Oh, come along with me then.”
“But sir, I have a wife with two children!”
“Bring them along! And you, come with us too!” he said to the other man.
“But sir, I have a wife with six children!” The second man answered.
“Bring them as well!”
They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says, “Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you.”
The rich man replied, “No, you don’t understand, the grass at my home is about two feet tall!”

Boss: Why do you want time off next week?
Employee: To get married
Boss: What stupid woman would marry you?
Employee: Your daughter!

An American businessman sent one of his Advertising/ Marketing people to Rome to try and get the Pope to record “Give us each our daily coke.” The P.R. man came back empty handed. He had offered the Pope $500,000 dollars and had been turned down. His boss commented, “Turned down half a million bucks! I wonder how much the bakeries are paying him?”



© 2015 ijokedb.com