Joke's Database
     
Have fun searching 100254 jokes and pictures!


Related:  Men vs. Women (+5688)      

1. Insert bulb and use as flashlight.

2. Fill with ink and use as bingo dabber.

3. Fill with Frosting and squeeze to decorate cake.

4. Use it as a decoration to hang from your rearview mirror.

5. Hang a dried out one inside an upside-down clay pot for an interesting bell. Gives new meaning to the phrase “ding dong.”

6. Nail it to the wall and use it for a coat rack.

7. In a pinch, poke extra holes in the end and replace shower nozzle.

8. Conversation piece on the coffee table (“Oh, that’s just Ronald when he was in his prime…”).

9. Redneck girl’s toothpick holder.

10. Dip it in candied apple glaze and make an all day sucker out of it.

11. Fill with Vicks and use as a nose inhaler.

12. Fill it up with plaster of Paris and use it as a microphone while singing the Lorena Bobbitt song.

13. Stick a Mickey mouse head on the tip, slit the dick horizontally, insert a spring in the bottom, and use as a Pez dispenser.

14. Soak in it Starch, let it dry, and use it as a dildo.

15. To induce vomiting.

16. Use it as a nozzle to provide a steady stream on your garden hose.

17. Nail it to the wall and hang your coffee mug on it.

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32430)      

A man walking down the beach sees an old bottle in the sand and begins to play kick-the-bottle to amuse himself. After a while he
picks it up, and a pissed-off genie emerges.
She says, “normally I grant 3 wishes, but in your case, you son-of-a-bitch, I am going to grant only 1.”
The man thinks a minute and says, “Okay, I want to wake up with 3 women in my bed.”
She says, “So be it!”, and disappears back into the bottle.
Next morning, the guy wakes up with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding and Hillary Clinton. He has no penis, a broken leg, and
no health insurance.

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32430)      

A man walking down the beach, sees a old bottle in the sand and begins to play kick-the-bottle to amuse himself. After a while he picks it up, and a pissed off genie emerges.
She says “normally I grant 3 wishes, but in your case, you son of a bitch, I am going to grant only 1″.
He thinks a minute and says – “OK, I want to wake up with 3 women in my bed”.
She says “So be it!”, and disappears back into the bottle.
Next morning, he wakes up with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding and Hilary Clinton. He has no penis, a broken leg, and no health insurance!

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Sex (+4814)      

Just after Lorena Bobbitt brutally cut off her husbands penis, she jumped into her car and sped away. On her way down the highway, holding her husbands penis in her hand, she decided to throw it out the window. She opened her window and tossed the penis as far as she could and sped away again.

Meanwhile 2 Canadians driving down the same highway happened to cross right by Lorenna just as she tossed it out the window and the penis hit their windshield smack dab in the middle.

Stunned but still quiet the 2 Canadians drove on. About 3 miles down the road the one Canadian turned to the other and said, “Man, did you see the size of the dick on that mosquito?”

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32430)      

A man walking down the beach sees an old bottle in the sand and begins to play kick-the-bottle to amuse himself. After a while he picks it up, and a pissed-off genie emerges. She says, “normally I grant 3 wishes, but in your case, you son-of-a-@#*%, I am going to grant only 1.”
The man thinks a minute and says, “Okay, I want to wake up with 3 women in my bed.” She says, “So be it!”, and disappears back into the bottle.
Next morning, the guy wakes up with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding and Hilary Clinton. He has no penis, a broken leg, and no health insurance.

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends


© 2015 ijokedb.com