Joke's Database
     
Have fun searching 100254 jokes and pictures!


Related:  Celebrity (+963)      

It is an open secret now that Britney Spears and Kevin’s marriage has started to fall apart… The reason being Kevin’s crazy Partying…

One day Kevin Federline wakes up at home with a huge hangover he can’t believe. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose. Kevin sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Kevin looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror, and notices a note on the table:

“Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go to my new video rehearsal-Love you!” He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. The babysitter is sitting on the couch watching TV.

Jack asks, “Mindy…what happened last night’”

“Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.”

“So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me’”

The babysitter, “Oh THAT!… Britney dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, “Leave me alone, lady, I’m married!”

Broken furniture – $85.26
Hot Breakfast – $4.20
Red Rose bud -$3.00
Two Aspirins -$.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time…Priceless!

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32426)      

What do Britney Spears and a computer have in common?

Their both cheap, white, and plastic….

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32426)      

Ask the following to a Blonde to see if she is a DUMB BLONDE or a smart blonde…yeah right…

1.Who do want to be most like in life:
A.Vanna White
B.Michelle Fiefer
C.Britney Spears
E.None of the Above

2.In a game of Hide-And-Go Seek, do you:
A.Run when you see the seeker
B.Stay hiding until the seeker finds you
C.Run when the seeker sees you
E.Follow the seeker quietly

3.What happens when you get Alzheimers Disease
A.You loose alot of weight
B.Gain weight
C.Get really smart
D.Loose your memory

4.How do you kill a bird:
A.Hit it
B.Throw it off a building
C.Cook it
D.All of the above

5.What’s an important question about pregnancy
A.Is it mine
B.How far along am I
C.Is it a boy or girl
D.What hospital should I go to for delivery

Don’t read them this part:

Results:
1.
A=5pts.
B=3pts.
C=2pts.
D=1pt.

2.
A=4
B=5
C=2
D=3

3.
A=4
B=3
C=5
D=1

4.
A=3
B=5
C=4
D=1

5.
A=5
B=1
C=3
D=2

TOTAL:
20 =Official Dumb Blonde; 15-19=Pretty Dumb; 10-14=Not Bad; 9-Smart for a Blonde

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32426)      

- MTV actually played videos in the 80′s.

- There was only one kind of Nike tennis shoes (white with a red swoosh), and they didn’t cost $125.

- A comb in your back pocket is more practical and less painful than a ring through your nose.

- In the 80′s, playing video games actually meant going out to DO something.

- In the 80′s, when you were out partying, you didn’t have to worry about your Mom calling you on your cell phone.

- In the 80s, we didn’t have to worry about getting our heads blown off at school – unless you put a whole pack of Pop Rocks in your mouth and drank a coke.

- Debbie Gibson vs. Britney Spears. New Kids on the Block vs. N’Sync. New Edition vs. Hanson. Ok, that one’s a draw.

- In the early 80′s, there were kids in your high school who could buy alcohol LEGALLY.

- Feathered hair was easier to care for than dreadlocks.

- In the 80′s, you didn’t have to worry about your pants falling down all the time. They were so tight we couldn’t get them off!

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends
Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32426)      

Ask the following to a Blonde to see if she is a DUMB BLONDE or a smart blonde…yeah right…
1.Who do want to be most like in life: A.Vanna White B.Michelle Fiefer C.Britney Spears E.None of the Above
2.In a game of Hide-And-Go Seek, do you: A.Run when you see the seeker B.Stay hiding until the seeker finds you C.Run when the seeker sees you E.Follow the seeker quietly
3.What happens when you get Alzheimers Disease A.You loose alot of weight B.Gain weight C.Get really smart D.Loose your memory
4.How do you kill a bird: A.Hit it B.Throw it off a building C.Cook it D.All of the above
5.What’s an important question about pregnancy A.Is it mine B.How far along am I C.Is it a boy or girl D.What hospital should I go to for delivery
Don’t read them this part:
Results:
1.
A=5pts. B=3pts. C=2pts. D=1pt.
2.
A=4 B=5 C=2 D=3
3.
A=4 B=3 C=5 D=1
4.
A=3 B=5 C=4 D=1
5.
A=5 B=1 C=3 D=2
TOTAL: 20 =Official Dumb Blonde; 15-19=Pretty Dumb; 10-14=Not Bad; 9-Smart for a Blonde

Share on Facebook!    Share on Twitter!    Share on Reddit!    Share on Stumbleupon!    Share on LinkedIn!    Share on Google!    Share with friends


© 2015 ijokedb.com