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Related:  Blonde (+4658), Q & A (+15907)      

Q: How do you describe a blonde surrounded by drooling idiots?
A: Flattered.

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Related:  Football (+145)      

Two football players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the Sugar Bowl the following week. The exam was fill-in-the-blank. The last question read, “Old MacDonald had a _________.”

Bubba was stumped. He had no idea of the answer. He knew he needed to get this one right to be sure he passed. Making sure the professor wasn’t watching, he tapped Tiny on the shoulder. “Pssst. Tiny. What’s the answer to the last question?” Tiny laughed. He looked around to make sure the professor hadn’t noticed then he turned to Bubba. “Bubba, you’re so stupid. Everyone knows Old MacDonald had a farm.”

“Oh yeah,” said Bubba. “I remember now.” He picked up his No. 2 pencil and started to write the answer in the blank. He stopped. Reaching to tap Tiny’s shoulder again, he whispered, “Tiny, how do you spell farm?”

“You are really dumb, Bubba. That’s so easy. Farm is spelled – E-I-E-I-O.”.

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Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32386)      

What did the cannibal do after he had dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.

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Related:  Animals (+5182)      

A man rented a camel to make a trip to an important customer out in the
desert. There was only one camel available, and it had one little problem,
the guy told him. Periodically, this camel would stop and refuse to move
until somebody beat it off. The man is desperate, so he decides he will go
along with that. He sets off into the desert. Sure as hell, he has to beat
off the camel every day for the first three days. On the fourth day, the
camel stops again and refuses to move, so the guy gets down and prepares
to do his duty, but the camel quickly steps aside. He tries again, And
again. Finally in exasperation he walks in front of the camel and says
“For Christ’s sake, what do you want now?” The camel puckers up and makes
little sucking noises.

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Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32386)      

Ideal date

At 17 Triple Stephen King feature at a drive-in
25 “Split the check before we go back to my place”
35 “Just come over.”
48 “Just come over and cook.”
66 Sex in the company jet on the way to Vegas.

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