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This old man in his eighties got up and was putting on his coat.
His wife said, “Where are you going?”
He said, “I’m going to the doctor.”
And she said, “Why? Are you sick?”
“No,” he said. “I’m going to get me some of those new Viagra pills.”
So his wife got up out of her rocker and was putting on her sweater
and he said, “Where are you going?”
She said, “I’m going to the doctor too.”
He said, “Why?”
She said, “If you’re going to start using that rusty old thing
again, I’m going to get a tetanus shot.”

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Related:  Q & A (+15908), Sex (+4812)      

Q:What do you call two guys in a sleepping bag?
A: A gay time….

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Related:  Animals (+5184), Men vs. Women (+5687), Q & A (+15908)      

Q: What’s the difference between your mother in law and a crocodile?

A: Crocodiles are kind. They tear at your flesh and hold you under the water to drown, then they push your body under
an old log to rot.

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Related:  Politics (+3831)      

They say that Christopher Columbus was the first Democrat. When he left to discover America, he didn’t know where he was going. When he got there he didn’t know where he was. And it was all done on a government grant.

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Related:  Sex (+4812)      

A small boy walks into his mothers room and catches her topless.
“Mummy, mummy, what are these?” he says, pointing to her breasts.
“Well, son,” she says, “these are balloons, and when you die,
they inflate and float you up to heaven.”
Incredibly, he appears to believe this explanation and goes off
quite satisfied.
Two days later while his mother is making tea, he rushes into
the kitchen.
“Mummy, mummy, Aunt Mary is dying!”
What do you mean? says his mother.
Well she’s in the garden shed, lying on the floor. Both her
balloons are out, Dad’s blowing them up, and she keeps yelling
“God, I’m coming! I’m coming!!!”

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