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Related:  Q & A (+15907), Valentine's Day (+249)      

Q: What did the Valentine’s card say to the stamp?
A: Stick with me and we’ll go places!

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Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32431)      

The couple were leaving the cocktail party, where the husband, slightly flushed, had been the life of the party.
“John,” she said, “did anyone ever tell you how fascinating, how romantic, and how handsome you are?”
“No,” the man replied happily, looking at his wife, “I don’t think anyone ever did?”
“Well,” she snapped, “then where did you ever get the idea!!!”

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Related:  Men vs. Women (+5690), Q & A (+15907)      

Q: What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?
A: When the power goes off.

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Related:  Politics (+3831)      

(To the tune of “Summer Lovin’” from the musical “Grease”)

Bill: “Summer intern, had me a blast.”

Monica: “White house intern, happened so fast.”

Bill: “Met a girl, crazy for me.”

Monica: “Met the prez, down on my knees.”

Bill: “Summer days, sucking away, oh, I, but those summer nights!”

Investigation Committee: “Well, ah..well, ah..well, ah..uh..Tell us more, tell us more…”

Linda Trip: “Try to remember your best.”

Investigation Committee: “Tell us more, tell us more…”

Kenneth Star: “Did he cum on your dress?”

Bill: “Wanted to screw her but she had a cramp.”

Monica: “The prez is sexy – he makes my panties damp.”

Bill: “She gave me head, right in the White House.”

Monica: “I said OK, just don’t cum in my mouth.

Investigation Committee: “Well, ah..well, ah..well, ah..uh..Tell us more, tell us more…”

Linda Trip: “He sounds like a swell guy.”

Investigation Committee: “Tell us more, tell us more..”

Kenneth Star: “Did he tell you to lie?”

Bill: “Press found out, it turned into a mess.”

Monica: “He gave me fifty bucks to buy a new dress.”

Bill: “She promised to lie, she made a vow.”

Monica: “Wonder who is servicing him now?”

Bill & Monica: “Sex filled dreams, ripped at the seams

But………oh………….Those White House Nights!”

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Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32431)      

As US tourists in Israel, a man and his wife were sitting outside
a Bethlehem souvenir shop, waiting for fellow tourists. An Arab
salesman approached them carrying belts.

After an impassioned sales talk yielded no results, he asked
where they were from.

“America,” the husband replied.

Looking at her dark hair and olive skin, the Arab responded.
“She’s not from the States.”

“Yes I am.” said the wife. He looked at her and asked. “Is he
your husband?” “Yes.” she replied.

Turning to the husband, he offered….. “I’ll give you 100 camels
for her.” The husband looked stunned, and there was a long
silence. Finally he replied, “she’s not for sale.”

After the salesman left, the somewhat indignant wife asked her
husband what took him so long to answer, to which the
husband replied, “I was trying to figure out how to get 100
camels back home.”

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