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Related:  Sport (+1015)      

The National Science Foundation announced the following study results on corporate America recreation preferences:

1. Sport of choice for maintenance level employees: BOWLING

2. Sport of choice for front line workers: FOOTBALL

3. Sport of choice for supervisors: BASEBALL

4. Sport of choice for middle management: TENNIS

5. Sport of choice for corporate officers: GOLF

CONCLUSION: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls.

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Related:  Blonde (+4661)      

Q: How does a blonde give a high-5?
A: She smacks herself in the forehead.

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Related:  Politics (+3831)      

These future bestsellers will not only be popular to the stupid, but they will also save trees. When they come out, you can expect each of them to take up no more than half of a page.

1. Attractive leaders of the Feminist Movement
2. Clinton Policies that actually save money
3. The Logic of the Politically Correct
4. History of the Countries where Socialism worked
5. Good Points of Clinton’s Health Program
6. Nazi-Feminists that Makes Sense
7. “The Submissive Woman” by Hillary Clinton.
8. Creating New Jobs in America – by Bill Clinton
9. “Life During Wartime” by Bill Clinton.
10. Avoiding the Tax and Spend Government – by Slick Willy
11. “Why People are More Important than Animals” – Greenpeace
12. “Deep-Thinking Liberals”
13. “The Contribution of Political Correctness to Free Speech”
14. “Why Political Correctness is not Censorship”
15. “The Merits of Gun Control”
16. “Feminists Worth Marrying”
17. “How Mass Unemployment Helps the Economy” by Socialists.
18. “To Tell the Truth” – by President Bill Clinton
19. Unshakeable Principles I Live By – by Bill Clinton
20. The Golden Voice of Roger Clinton
21. Roger Clinton: My Career Without My Brother Bill

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Related:  Men vs. Women (+5688)      

A group of girlfriends are on vacation, when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads “For Women Only”. Since they were without their boyfriends or parents, they decide to go in.

The Bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. “We have 5 floors…go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It’s easy to decide, since each floor has signs telling you what’s inside”.

So they start going up, and on the first floor the sign reads “All the men here have it short and thin” ….the friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor. The sign on the Second floor reads “All the men here have it long and thin”.

Still, this wasn’t good enough so the friends move up to the third floor, where the sign read “All the men here have it short and thick”. This was still another disappointment, but knowing there are still 2 floors left, they move on to the next floor.

On the Fourth floor, the sign was perfect. “All the men here have it long and thick” The women get all excited and are going in when they realize that there is one floor left.

Wondering what they were missing, they go to the Fifth floor, where the sign read “There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman”

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Related:  Unsorted Jokes (+32430)      

One day the different parts of the body were having an
argument to see which should be in charge.

The brain said “I do all the thinking so I’m the most
important and I should be in charge.”

The eyes said “I see everything and let the rest of you
know where we are, so I’m the most important and I
should be in charge.”

The hands said “Without me we wouldn’t be able to pick
anything up or move anything. So I’m the most important
and I should be in charge.”

The stomach said “I turn the food we eat into energy for
the rest of you. Without me, we’d starve. So I’m the most
important and I should be in charge.”

The legs said “Without me we wouldn’t be able to move
anywhere. So I’m the most important and I should be in
charge.”

Then the rectum said “I think I should be in charge.”

All the rest of the parts said “YOU?!? You don’t do
anything! You’re not important! You can’t be in charge.”

So the rectum closed up. After a few days, the legs were all
wobbly, the stomach was all queasy, the hands were all shaky,
the eyes were all watery, and the brain was all cloudy.

They all agreed that they couldn’t take any more of this and
agreed to put the rectum in charge.

Today’s lesson: You don’t have to be the most important to be
in charge, just an a – - hole.

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