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Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Hutch
Hutch who?
God bless you!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Ben
Ben who?
Ben waiting, what took you so long?

Knock-nock
Who’s there?
Lettuce
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, it’s cold out here!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Little old lady
Little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Atch
Atch who?
Bless you!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Dishes
Dishes who?
Dishes the stupidest knock-knock joke ever!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Doris
Doris who?
Doris closed, that’s why I’m knocking.

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Acid
Acid who?
Acid sit down and be quiet!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Ada
Ada who?
Ada burger for lunch.

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Adair
Adair who?
Adair once but I’m bald now!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Adolf
Adolf who?
Adolf ball hit me in the mouth!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alaska
Alaska who?
Alaska my friend the question then!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Aida
Aida who?
Aida lot of sweets and now I’ve got tummy ache!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Aladdin
Aladdin who?
Aladdin the street wants a word with you.

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alba
Alba who?
Alba in the kitchen if you need me.

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alec
Alec who?
Alec-tricity. Isn’t that a shock?!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alexia
Alexia who?
Alexia again to open this door!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alfalfa
Alfalfa who?
Alfalfa you, if you give me a kiss!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alfie
Alfie who?
Alfie terrible if you leave!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alfred
Alfred who?
Alfred the needle if you sew!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Allied
Allied who?
Allied, so sue me!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Alma
Alma who?
Alma-ny knock-knock jokes can you take?!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Amana
Amana who?
Amana bad mood!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Ammonia
Ammonia who?
Ammonia little kid!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Amory
Amory who?
Amory Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Amy
Amy who?
Amy fraid I’ve forgotten!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Annetta
Annetta who?
Annetta wisecrack and you’re out of here!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Augusta
Augusta who?
Augusta go home now!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Boo!
Boo who?
Don’t cry, it’s only a joke!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Button
Button who?
Button in is not polite!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Carl
Carl who?
Carl get you there quicker than if you walk!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Cash
Cash who?
I knew you were nuts!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Cassie
Cassie who?
Cassie the forest for the trees!

Knock Knock
Who’s there !
Celeste !
Celeste who ?
Celeste time I’m going to tell you this !

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Cereal
Cereal who?
Cereal pleasure to meet you!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Colleen
Colleen who?
Colleen up this mess!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Cologne
Cologne who?
Cologne me names won’t help!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Cozy
Cozy who?
Cozy who’s knocking!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Collier
Collier who?
Collier big brother see if I care!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Congo
Congo who?
Congo out, I’m grounded!

Knock-knock
Who’s There?
Impatient cow
Impatient c—MOO!!!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Lettuce
Lettuce who?
Lettuce pray!!!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Oops, wrong door!

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
I
I who?
I am!!!!!

Knock-knock!
Who’s there?
Madame
Madame who?
Madame foot will be up your butt if you don’t open this door!

Three women are stranded on an island. One woman tripped over something. She looks down and sees a lamp. The girls rub the lamp and to their astonishment, a Genie pops out.
“I will grant you 3 wishes, but since there of three of you, you will each get one wish.”
The first girl says, “I want to be strong enough to swim to shore.” The Genie snapped his fingers, and the girl set out. Not 15 feet off the island, a shark came and ate her.
The second girl says, “I want to be skilled enough to create something that will get me off the island.” With that, the Genie snapped his fingers, giving the girl some logs and string, and she made a raft and set out. When she was 15 feet off shore, the tide grew strong, and the raft capsized, killing her.
The third girl thought long and hard, when finally she came up with her wish. “I wish to be smart enough to find a way off the island.” The Genie snapped his fingers, and she turned into a man and took the bridge.

A man who owned a hand-operated rotisserie was barbecuing a chicken in his back yard when a hippie strolled by. The hippie stood
and watched for a couple of minutes and then said slowly, “Uh… I don’t want to bug you man, but your music’s stopped, and
your monkey’s on fire.”

1. Weed
2. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges
3. The local hero is a pot-smoking snowboarder
4. The local wine doesn’t taste like malt vinegar
5. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is 5 hours from downtown
6. A university with a nude beach
7. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations
8. If a cop pulls you over, just offer them some of your hash
9. There’s always some sort of deforestation protest going on
10. Cannabis

“As you know, I don’t need to take any money from anybody. I have plenty of money myself. I will make the decisions for the people.”



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