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There was a young vampire called mable,
whose periods were always quite stable,
at every full moon
she took out a spoon,
and drank herself under the table.

There was a young man who’s dong
Was prodigiously, massively long
Down the sides of his whang,
two testes did hang
Which attracted a curious throng.

There once was a pirate named Bates
Who attempted to rhumba on skates.
He fell on his cutlass
Which rendered him nutless
And practically useless on dates.

There was a young lady of Wheeling,
Who professed to a lack of sexual feeling.
But a cynic named Boris
Just touched her clitoris,
And she had to be scraped from the ceiling.

There was a young Scotchman named Jock
Who had a most horrible shock:
He once took a shit
In a leaf-covered pit,
And the crap sprung a trap on his cock.



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