There once was a monk in Siberia
Whose existence got steadily drearier.
He did to a nun
What he shouldn’t have done
And made her a mother superior!

There was a young lady of Worcester
Who dreamt that a rooster seduced her.
She woke with a scream,
But ’twas only a dream
A lump in the mattress had goosed her.

While Titian was mixing rose madder,
his model was posed on a ladder.
Her position to Titian
suggested fruition.
So he mounted the ladder and had her.

I heard that she would never say no
To oral sex. Just 10 bucks for a blow.
But when down on her knees
I said, “Oh baby please
Move up, you’re too low, that’s my toe!”

There was a young lassie from Morton,
who had one long tit and one short ‘en,
on top of all that,
a great hairy twat,
and a fart like a six fifty Norton.