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This couple goes to an agricultural show way out in the countryside a fine Sunday afternoon and are watching the auctioning off of bulls.

The guy selling the bulls announces the first bull to be auctioned off: “A fine specimen, this bull reproduced 60 times last year.”

The wife nudges her husband in the ribs and comments, “See! That was more than 5 times a month!”

The second bull is to be sold: “Another fine specimen, this wonder reproduced 120 times last year.”

Again the wife bugs her husband, “Hey, that’s some 10 times a month. What do YOU say to that?!”

Her husband is getting really annoyed with this comparison.

The third bull is up for sale: “And this extraordinary specimen reproduced 365 times last year!”

The wife slaps her husband on the arm and yells, “That’s once a day, every day of the year! How about YOU?!”

The husband was pretty irritated by now and yells back, “Sure, once a day!…… But ask the auctioneer if they were all with the same cow!!!”

Bobby-joe was riding in Jeds truck
Jed pulled over, got out and pointed down yawnder and said, “Thats where I first had sex.”
Bobby-Joe said,”How was it.”
Jed said,”It was great til’ I looked up and saw her mom was watching.”
Bobby-Joe yelled,”Oh shit, what did she say??”
Jed repiled “Baaa”

After spending a happy evening drinking together, two acquaintances promise to meet again in ten years at the same bar, same time.

Ten years later, the first guy walks in, looks around, and sure enough, there is his friend on a bar stool. He clasps the old friend’s hand and cries, “The day we left, I didn’t think I’d really see you here!”

The friend looks up, stares, sways slightly and asks, “Who left?”

When you grow old
And your balls grow cold
And the tip of your dick turns blue
and you fiddle and diddle
And it bends in the middle
Your through you bastard
Your through!

A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her “go do something to prove them wrong! Why don’t you learn all the state capitals or something?”
The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks herself up for two weeks studying. The next party she goes to, some guy is making dumb blonde comments to her.
She gets all indignant and claims, “I’m NOT a dumb blonde. In fact, I can name ALL the state capitals!”
The guy doesn’t believe her, so she dares him to test her.
He says “Okay, what’s the Capital of Montana?”
The blonde tosses her hair in triumph and says, “That’s easy! It’s M!”

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