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Q: Why is a blonde’s coffin y-shaped?
A: Because she is so used to having her legs spread.

Two brothers, ages 6 and 8, decide they are old enough to start cursing. So they plan to use dirty words the next morning at breakfast. The 8-year-old says he’ll use the world HELL and tells the 6-year-old to use ASS.
Well, the next morning they head downstairs for breakfast.
And when their mother asks them what they want, the 8-year-old says, “Ah, Hell, I’ll have some Fruit Loops.” Shocked, the mother wheels around and backhands him on his chair, sending him screaming back upstairs.
She then turns to the 6-year-old and says, “What are you going to have?”
He replies, “I don’t know, but you can bet your ass it ain’t gonna be Fruit Loops.”

A drunk guy is driving the wrong way on a one-way street and a cop stops him.

The cop goes to the guy and says “Hey didn’t you see the arrows??”

The drunk guy replies ” I didn’t even see the Indians!”

A man and his son were walking through a field, and saw two dogs mating. The little boy asked his Dad what was happening.
The Father replied, “Well, son, they’re making a puppy.”
The following evening, the little boy was thirsty, so he went from his bed to get a glass of water. Not being able to reach the glasses, he walked unannounced into his parents bedroom, who were making love in their usual missionary position.
Confused, the boy asked what were they doing.
The Dad responded very slowly and caringly
to his impressionanle little boy, “Well, son, we are making you a little brother.”
The little boy replied, “Please turn Mom over, Dad, I’d rather have a puppy!”

Q: What’s black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?
A: A blonde electrician.

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