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Q: What’s the difference between a husband and a boyfriend?
A: About forty-five minutes.

Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker’s on?
A: It’s on. It’s off. It’s on. it’s off….

A blonde is visiting Washington, DC. This is her first time to the city, so she wants to see the capitol building. Unfortunately, she can’t find it, so she asks a police officer for directions. “Excuse me, officer,” the blonde says, “How do I get to the capitol building?”

The officer says, “Wait here at this bus stop for the number 54 bus. It’ll take you right there.”

The blonde thanks the officer and he drives off.

Three hours later the police officer comes back to the same area, and sure enough the blonde is still waiting at the same bus stop. The officer gets out of his car and says, “Excuse me, but to get to the capitol building, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus. That was three hours ago. Why are you still waiting?”

The blonde says, “Don’t worry, officer, it won’t be long now. The 45th bus just went by!”

Q: Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?
A: Because their balls fall over their asshole and they vapor-lock.

A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him, and says, “Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?” The man says back to the blind man, “Look buddy, I’m blonde. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler and he is blonde. The bouncer is blonde. The man sitting over to your left is also blonde. Still wanna tell that blonde joke?” The blind man is silent for a moment and then says, “Nah, I wouldn’t want to have to explain it five times.”



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