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Mary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark swimming around a man. The man was screaming, “Help me! Help me!”
Mary Jane laughed and laughed! She knew that the shark was never going to help that man!

When the employees of a restaurant attended a fire safety seminar, they watched a fire official demonstrate the proper way to operate an extinguisher.

“Pull the pin like a hand grenade,” he explained, “then depress the trigger to release the foam.”

Later a blonde employee was selected to extinguish a controlled fire in the parking lot. In her nervousness, she forgot to pull the pin.

The instructor hinted, “Like a hand grenade, remember?”

In a burst of confidence she pulled the pin …. and hurled the extinguisher at the blaze.

Q: What do you get when you cross a blonde with an ape?
A: A retarded ape.

The blonde was broke and desparate. She knocked on the door of a doctor’s house and said she needed money and would be willing to work for it. The doctor asked if she would be willing to paint his porch. He would give her $50 to do it.
The blonde said that would be fine. The doctor’s wife said the blonde must be really dumb to do such a big job for only $50. “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?” the wife asked. “I guess so,” the doctor told his wife. A few minutes later, the blonde knocked on the door. “All done,” she said, “and by the way, it’s not a porch, it’s a Ferrari.”

Q: Why do blondes always have such big hair?

A: So they can catch things that are over their heads.

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