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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender for some drinks:

Brunette: “I’ll have a B and C.”

Bartender: “What is a B and C?”

Brunette: “Bourbon and Coke.”

Redhead: “And, I’ll have a G and T.”

Bartender: “What’s a G and T?”

Redhead: “Gin and tonic.”

Blonde: “I’ll have a 15.”

Bartender: “What’s a 15?”

Blonde: “7 and 7″

Q: What’s the difference between a pitbull and a blonde with PMS?
A: Lipstick.

One morning this blonde calls her friend and says, “Please come over and help me. I have this killer jigsaw puzzle and I can’t figure out how to start it.”

Her friend asks, “What is it a puzzle of?”

The blonde says, “From the picture on the box, it’s a tiger.”

The blonde’s friend figures that he’s pretty good at puzzles, so he heads over to her place.

She lets him in the door and shows him to where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then studies the box.

He then turns to her and says: “First, no matter what I do, I’m not going to be able to show you how to assemble these to look like the picture of that tiger.”

The blonde frowns.

He continues, “Second, I’d advise you to relax, have a cup of coffee, and put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box.”

There was this gorgeous blonde going to Jamaica. She boarded the airplane and chose a seat at the front.

The stewardess went around checking the tickets an saw she was in the wrong seat and section.

The stewardess said, “Excuse me ma’am. You are in the wrong section and seat. You are supposed to be in coach, not first class.”

The lady looked up at her and said, “LOOK, I am a gorgeous blonde with beautiful blue eyes and a figure to die for. I am on vacation and you will not get me to move.”

So the stewardess moved on and came back to her again a bit later. The blonde continued her her arguement and proceeded to tell her how perfect she was.

The stewardess, at the point of exasperation, then went and got the head stewardess to handle the matter. The blonde proceeded to tell her, “Look, I am tall, long-legged, gorgeous blonde hair, deep blue eyes and a body to kill for. I am on vacation, I am going to Jamaica and I am not moving.”

The head stewardess realized she had a standoff and went to the cockpit and spoke to the pilot.

He decided to pay the blonde a visit. “How are you doing today, ma’am?” he asked.

“I AM NOT MOVING,” she said.

So the pilot reached down and whispered something in her ear. She jumped up–boy was she ever pissed–gathered all her things and went to the back to her seat in coach.

The two stewardesses were puzzled. “What ever did you say to her to make her move? We tried everything.”

“I told her the front of the plane wasn’t going to Jamaica.”

Q: Why can’t blonds water ski?

A: When ever they get wet they lay down and spread there legs.



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