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Rejection Lines Given By Women
Published: 1 week ago     submited by
Related: Men vs. Women (+5690)     
         

(and the translation of what they mean!)

* I think of you as a brother.
(You remind me of that inbred banjo geek in “Deliverance.”)

* There’s a slight difference in our ages.
(I don’t want to do my DAD.)

* I’m not attracted to you in ‘that’ way.
(You ugly dork.)

* My life is too complicated right now.
(I don’t want you spending the night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other guys I’m seeing.)

* I’ve got a boyfriend.
(I prefer my male cat and 1/2 gallon Ben & Jerry’s ice cream.)

* I don’t date men where I work.
(I wouldn’t date you if you’re in the same *solar system*, much less the same building.)

* It’s not you, it’s me.
(It’s you.)

* I’m concentrating on my career.
(Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better than dating you.)

* I’m celibate.
(I’ve sworn off the likes of you or I’d rather be gang raped by midgets or I’d rather drink turpentine and piss on a brush fire or when bats fly out of my butt.)

* Let’s be friends.
(I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with.)

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