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Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

Q: How do you know when a blonde has been working on your computer?

A: There’s white out on the screen and lipstick on the joystick!

Q: How does a blonde get pregnant?

A: And I thought blondes were dumb!

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to “instruction manuals.”

A cop saw a car weaving all over the road and pulled it over. He walked up to the car and saw a nice-looking blonde woman behind the wheel. There was a strong smell of liquor on her breath. He said, “I’m going to give you a breathalyzer test to determine if you are under the influence of alcohol.”

She blew up the balloon and he walked it back to the police car. After a couple of minutes, he returned to her car and said, “It looks like you’ve had a couple of stiff ones.”

She replied, “You mean it shows that, too?”

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