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Q: What Is A Blonde’s Most Frequently Used 4 Letter Word?
A: NEXT!

A man calls his mother in Florida. “Mom, how are you?”

“Not too good,” says the mother. “I’ve been very weak.”

The son says, “Why are you so weak?”

She says, “Because I haven’t eaten in 38 days.”

The man says, “That’s terrible. Why haven’t you eaten in 38 days?”

The mother answers, “Because I didn’t want my mouth to be full of food if you should call.”

Q: What do you do if your boyfriend walks out?
A: Close the door

As I lay me down to sleep
I pray for a woman who’s very cheap.

One who’s sexy, blonde and long.
Who notices that she’s mostly wrong.

One who sucks and doesn’t speak.
And promises to do so at least once a week.

I pray that she is very randy,
’cause one like that would come in pretty handy.

Opens her legs and lies on the floor,
and once I’m done, she wants no more.

Oh, send me a woman who will not play with my mind.
Who knows what she wants and that’s a LOT from behind!

One who’ll screw till my body’s a twitchin’
and brings me a beer when she comes from the kitchen!

I pray that she’ll last right up to the end,
And would never complain when I do her best friend.

Thanks in advance and you know I can’t wait,
so I’ll screw all the rest ’cause it’s never too late.

Amen.

Q: What’s the difference between a man and a cow?
A: One brain cell that prevents them from shitting all over the place!



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