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Q: Why couldnt the blonde dial 911?
A: Because she couldnt find the 11.

Q: Why did the blonde steal the police car?

A: She saw 911 and thought it was a porche.

Q: How is being at a singles bar different than being at the circus?
A: At the circus the clowns don’t talk.

John asks his wife, Mary, what she wants to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new Mink Coat?” he asks.

“Not really,” says Mary.

“Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?” says John.

“No,” she responds.

“What about a new vacation home in the country?” he suggests.

She again rejects his offer with a, “No thanks.”

“Well what would you like for your anniversary?” John asks.

“John, I’d like a divorce,” answers Mary.

“Sorry, I wasn’t planning to spend that much,” says John.

Q: Why don’t blondes eat Jello?

A: They can’t figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.

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