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Q: What do you call a blonde at university?

A: A visitor.

Q: Why do all blondes all have a dimple on their chin and a flat forehead?
A: Finger on chin I don’t know. Hits forehead Oh I get it!

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were walking along the beach. A seagull flies over and craps all over the blonde.

The brunette says in a disgusted voice, “Hang on the bathroom is just up the hill, I’ll go get some toilet paper.”

After she leaves the blonde begins to laugh.

The redhead says, “What’s so funny?”

The blonde says, “Well, blondes are supposed to be so dumb and look at her. By the time she gets back with that toilet paper that seagull will be miles away!”

A man came home from work one day and found total mayhem. The three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud. Empty food boxes and wrappers were strewn across the yard.
When he went inside, the mess was even worse. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against the wall. In the front room, the TV was loudly blaring on a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and clothing.
In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, cereal had been spilled on the counter, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over more piles of clothes and toys, to look for his wife. He was becoming worried that she may be ill, or that something serious had happened.
He found her in the bedroom, still curled in the bed in her pajamas, reading a book. She looked up at him and smiled and asked how his day went.
He looked at her bewildered and asked, “What happened here today?”
She smiled and answered, “You know how every day when you come home from work, you ask me what in the hell I do all day?”
“Yes,” he said, baffled.
“Well,” she said, “today I didn’t do any of it!”

Q: A blonde and a scrunchy fell off a cliff. Which landed first?
A: The scrunchy, the blonde had to ask for directions.



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