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This really really old guy is walking on the beach one day. He hears a little teenie tiny voice calling out “Hey
Mister … pssst … come here.”
He looks around and sees a little tiny frog under a palm tree. He picks it up and it says “Hey Mister … if you kiss
me, I’ll turn into a beautiful young woman and your wishes will be my commands forever.”
He takes the frog, puts it in his pocket, and starts to walk back toward home.
The frog says “Hey, what are ya doing? Don’t ya want to kiss me?”
The old man says, “No … to tell you the truth, at my age, a talking frog is worth a whole lot more to me.”

Q: What’s the difference between a pitbull and a blonde with PMS?

A: Lipstick.

Q: What’s the difference between a computer and a blonde?
A: The computer is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on.

A language instructor was explaining to her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine. Things like ‘chalk’ or ‘pencil,’ she described, would have a gender association although in English these words were neutral.
Puzzled, one student raised his hand and asked, “What gender is a computer?”
The teacher wasn’t certain which it was, and so divided the class into two groups and asked them to decide if a computer should be masculine or feminine. One group was comprised of the women in the class, and the other, of men. Both groups were asked to give four reasons for their recommendation.

The group of women concluded that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve your problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you might have had a better model.

The men, on the other hand, decided that computers should definitely be referred to in the feminine gender because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Q: What is six inches long, has a bald head, and drives women crazy?

A: A hundred dollar bill.

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