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My mother-in-laws and I were happy for 20 years, then we met each other.

The doorbell rang this morning. When I opened the door, there was my mother-in-law on the front step.
She said, “Can I stay here for a few days?”
I said, “Sure you can.” And shut the door in her face.

“It was really cold outside today.”
“How cold was it?”
“It was colder than a mother-in-law’s kiss!”

Or, the definition of mixed emotions – seeing your mother-in-law drive over the cliff in your new car.

A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A longblack hearse was followed by a second long black hearse and behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit bull on a leash. Behind her were 200 women walking single file.
The woman couldn’t contain her curiosity. She respectfully approached the woman walking the dog and said “I am so sorry for your loss and I know now is a bad time to disturb you you but I’ve never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?”
The woman replied, “Well, that first hearse is for my husband.”
“What happened to him?”
“My dog attacked and killed him.”
“Well who is in the second hearse?”
The woman answered, “My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my husband when the dog turned on her.”
A poignant moment of silence passed between the two women.
“May I borrow the dog?”
“Get in line.”

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