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Q: Why did eighteen blondes go to the movies together?

A: They heard that under seventeen weren’t admitted!

A blonde who got a fishing rod for her birthday decided to go ice fishing.

So early the next morning she got all her gear and headed out.

When she reached her destination, she cut a hole in the ice and dipped the rod in.

Then suddenly she heard a voice that said: “Uh, Ma’am, there’s no fish in there.”

So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish there.

So she moves again and the voice tells her there are no fish there.

So she looks up and see’s a man looking down at her. “How do you know there are no fish there?” asks the blonde.

So the man cooly says, “Well first of all, this is a hockey rink.”

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?

A: You don’t. They’re born that way.

The mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple’s house. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house.
She saw her daughter-in law standing naked by the door.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the daughter-in-law answered.
“But you’re naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.
“This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law explained.
“Love dress? But you’re naked!”
“My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it makes me happy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home from work any minute.”
The mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left.
On the way home she thought about the love dress. When she got home she got undressed, showered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door.
Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
“This is my love dress” she replied.
He responded, “Needs ironing!”

Q: How many blonds does it take to make Chocolate Chip Cookies?
A: 5, 1 to mix the batter and 4 to squeeze the rabbit.

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