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1. Go buy a turkey.

2. Take a drink of whiskey (scotch) or Jack Daniels.

3. Put turkey in the oven.

4. Take another 2 drinks of whiskey.

5. Set the degree at 375 ovens

6. Take 3 more whiskeys of drink.

7. Turn oven the on.

8. Take 4 whisks of drinky.

9. Turk the bastey.

10. Whiskey another bottle of get.

11. Stick a turkey in the thermometer

12. Glass yourself a pour of whiskey.

13. Bake the whiskey for 4 hours.

14. Take the oven out of the turkey.

15. Take the oven out of the turkey.

16. Floor the turkey up off of the pick.

17. Turk the carvey.

18. Get yourself another scottle of botch.

19. Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey.

20) Bless the saying, pass and eat out.

Q: What’s the difference between a bunny and a lumberjack?

A: One chews and hops, the other hews and chops.

The sun-scorched vampire was crawling through the desert, crying ‘Blood! Blodd!’

Q: What would you get if you crossed a stupid boy with a well known Irish ballad?
A: “O Dummy Boy”!

Q: Did you hear about the tree’s birthday?

A: It was a sappy one!

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