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Stevenson’s boss came into his office one morning and caught him hugging his secretary. He said in a rage, “Is this what you get paid for?!” Stevenson replied, “Nope, I do this for free!”

Q: Why is santa clause so old?
A: Because if he was young he wouldn’t make money to buy toys.

Q: What did the french fries dress up as for Halloween?
A: Masked potatoes.

To: All Employees
From: Management
Subject: Office conduct during the Christmas season

Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Federal Revelry Office and Leisure Industry Council).

1. Running aluminum foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel is discouraged.

2. Playing Jingle Bells on the push-button phone is forbidden (it runs up an incredible long distance bill).

3. Work requests are not to be filed under “Bah humbug.”

4. Company cars are not to be used to go over the river and through the woods to Grandma’s house.

5. All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE July 25.

6. Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines.

In spite of all this, the staff is encouraged to have a Happy Holiday.

Q: Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy?

A: It was Valenswine’s Day!



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