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Moshe goes to Heathrow Airport to fly to New York. While he is waiting for his flight, he notices a lady sitting nearby crying. So he goes over and asks her if anything was wrong.
She says, “My son John moved to New York some months ago and I havent heard from him since. I’m so worried. Even though we’re Jewish, he’s never called or written to me. So I come here from time to time because he left from this airport and I feel closer to him here than anywhere else.”
As they talk, the lady asks, “Would you by any chance be going to New York?”
Moshe replies, “Well, as a matter of fact I am.”
She says, “Oh would you please find my son and ask him to call me? His name is John Dun, spelled with one N.”
Moshe replies, “I dont think it’s possible to find one man in New York.”
She says, “Oh, please try. It would mean so much to me. I miss him so very much.”
After much pleading, Moshe finally agrees to do his best.
All the way to New York, he wonders, “How can I ever find her son?” When the plane lands, he takes a cab to his hotel. As the cab nears his hotel, Moshe sees on the side of one of the sky scrapers ‘DUN AND BRADSTREET’ so he says to himself, “This might be easier than I thought.”
Later that day, after unpacking, he goes into the D&B building, walks up to the receptionist and asks, “Do you have a John here?”
She replies, “Yes. Down this hall to the right and it’s the third door on the left.”
He thanks her and goes looking for the door she pointed out. He finds it and goes in. Just as he walks into the room, there is a man there, drying his hands. Moshe says to him, “Are you Dun?”
The man replies, “Yes.”
Moshe says, “Call your mother.”

Rifka and Benjy, a 70 year old married couple, are on a long drive and decide to stop off for a night’s rest before continuing with their journey. So when they reach Minky’s Hotel, they go up to the desk and ask the clerk for a room.
“I’m sorry,” he tells them, “all our normal rooms are taken. But don’t worry, I’ve got the ideal room for a nice couple like you – the bridal suite.”
“Don’t be stupid,” says Benjy, “weve been married for over 40 years. Why do you think we need the bridal suite?”
“Well,” replies the clerk, “if I gave you the ballroom, would you have to dance?”

At the Henry Street Hebrew School, Mr. Goldblatt, the new teacher, finished the day’s lesson. It was now time for the usual question period.
“Mr. Goldblatt,” announced little Joey, “there’s somethin’ I can’t figure out.”
“What’s that Joey?” asked Mr. Goldblatt.
“Well accordin’ to the Bible, the Children of Israel crossed the Red Sea, right?”
“Right.”
“An’ the Children of Israel beat up the Phillistines, right?”
“Er – right.”
“An’ the Children of Israel built the Temple, right?”
“Again you’re right.”
“An’ the Children of Israel fought the ‘gyptians, an’ the Children of Israel fought the Romans, an’ the Children of Israel wuz always doin’ somethin’ important, right?”
“All that is right, too,” agreed Mr. Goldblatt. “So what’s your question?”
“What I wanna know is this,” asked Joey, “What wuz the grown-ups doin’ all that time?”

Moishe goes to his doctor for his annual check-up
The doctor says..Do you have any problems Mr. Schwartz? Yes I do doctor..I can’t pee..You can’t pee? No says Moishe..I can’t pee! How old are you says the doctor. I’m 87 years old. You’re 87 years old? Yes I’m 87 years old! Well..says the doctor..I think you peed enough.
And now Mr Schwartz, I’m going to need a sample of your urine, your feces and your sperm. Moishe says.HERE TAKE MY SHORTS!

Yitzhak and Freda go out to see Fiddler on the Roof on stage. This is the most sold out show of the year.
Somehow, they’ve been lucky and manage to get best seats in the front row. But they notice that there’s an empty seat in the row behind them. When intermission comes and no one has sat in that seat, Freda turns to the woman sitting next to the empty seat and asks, “Pardon me, but as this is such a sold out show and in such demand, we were wondering why that seat is empty.”
The woman says, “That’s my late husband’s seat.”
Freda is horrified and apologises for being so insensitive. But a few minutes later, she turns around again.
“Without meaning to be rude or anything, this is an incredibly hard show to get into. Surely you must have a friend or a relative who would have wanted to come and see the show?”
The woman nods, but explains, “They’re all at the shiva.”



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