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THE CITY OF LOS ANGELES HIGH SCHOOL MATH PROFICIENCY EXAM

NAME: ____________________ GANG NAME: ___________________

1. Little Johnny has an AK-47 with a 30 round clip. He usually misses 6 out of every 10 shots and he uses 13 rounds per drive-by shooting. How many drive-by shootings can Little Johnny attempt before he has to reload?

2. Jose has 2 ounces of cocaine. If he sells an 8 ball to Antonio for $320 and 2 grams to Juan for $85 per gram, what is the street value of the rest of his hold?

3. Jerome wants to cut the pound of cocaine he bought for $40,000 to make 20% profit. How many ounces will he need?

4. Willie gets $200 for a stolen BMW, $150 for stealing a Corvette, and $100 for a 4×4. If he steals 1 BMW, 2 Corvettes and 3 4×4’s, how many more corvettes must he have to steal to have $900?

5. Raoul got 6 years for murder. He also got $10,000 for the hit. If his common-law wife spends $100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out? Extra credit bonus: how much more time will he get for killing the wife that spent his money?

6. If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square feet and the average letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can be free?

7. Bernie is a lookout for the gang. Bernie has a Boa Constrictor that eats 3 small rats per week at a cost of $5 per rat. If Bernie makes $700 a week as a lookout, how many weeks can he feed the Boa on one week’s income?

8. Billy steals Joe’s skateboard. As Billy skates away at 35 mph, Joe loads his .357 Magnum. If it takes Joe 20 seconds to load his magnum, how far away will Billy be when he gets whacked?

Teacher: What’s 2 and 2
Pupil: 4
Teacher: That’s good
Pupil: Good?, that’s perfect!

The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, “Now I’ll show you this frog in my pocket.” He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, “That’s funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch.”
The teacher brings a statue of Venus into class and asks, “What do you like best about it, class? Let’s start with you, Robert.”
“The artwork,” says Robert.
“Very good. And you, Peter?”
“Her tits!” says Peter.
“Peter, get out! Go stand in the hall,” responds the teacher with disgust. “And you, Johnny?”
“I’m leaving, teacher, I’m leaving…”

A teacher was retiring after 30 years of teaching, so each child decided they wanted to bring her a special retirement present. A little girl who was the daughter of a fine chocolate dealer brought her a box full of fine chocolates.
A little boy who was the son of a florist brought her a big bouquet of flowers. Another little boy who was the son of a fine liquor dealer brought her a big box that was sealed, and it had something leaking from the bottom of the box. The teacher said, “I bet I know what this is!”
She tasted some of the juices that were leaking from the box and said, “I bet this is some wine!”
The little boy said, “Nope!”
She tasted it again and said “Liquor?”
The little boy said, “Nope!”
She tasted it again and said, “Beer?”
The little boy said, “Nope!”
She said, “Well what is it?”
The little boy said, “A puppy!”

Little Johnny was in a spelling bee in class. He had to spell the word and use it in a sentence. The teacher asked him to please spell the word EAR.
Little Johnny stood up and proudly said EAR E,A,R. Then to use it in a sentence he pretended to take a big hit off a joint and then while pretending to have his lungs full of smoke he predended to pass the joint to little Suzy and said “Ear”



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