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A little boy did not go to school one day. The next day when the teacher asked him why, he said “Our cow was on heat, so I had to take her to the Bull”.
“How disgusting” said the teacher “I am sure your father could have done that”
“No ma’m, he couldn’t have” said the little sod “It has to be the Bull”.

Teacher: Your new here aren’t you, what’s your name?
Pupil: Fred Mickey Smith
Teacher: I’ll call you Fred Smith then.
Pupil: My dad won’t like that.
Teacher: Why is that?
Pupil: He doesn’t like people taking the Mickey out of my name!

Teacher: You missed school yesterday didn’t you?
Pupil: Not very much!

Teacher: If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?
Paddy: Seven!
Teacher: No, listen carefully again. If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?
Paddy: Seven!

Teacher: Let’s try this another way. If I give you two apples and two apples and another two apples, how many apples have you got?
Paddy: Six.

Teacher: Good. Now if I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?
Paddy: Seven!

Teacher: How on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits is seven?
Paddy: I’ve already got one rabbit at home now!

Billy and Willy were at Sunday school studying about Noah’s ark. On the way home, Willy asked, “Do you think Noah did much fishing?”
“How could he?” said Billy. “He only had two worms”.



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