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Billy and Willy were at Sunday school studying about Noah’s ark. On the way home, Willy asked, “Do you think Noah did much fishing?”
“How could he?” said Billy. “He only had two worms”.

Principal: So tell me, Mr Wartman. Is that little Andrew Anderson as hopeless as he was last year?
Teacher: Well, I don’t like to say he’s hopeless. But he did have to cheat to get an F on a test today.

A young schoolboy was having a hard time pronouncing the letter “R,” and all the other kids were, of course, teasing him about it. To help him out, the teacher gave him a sentence to practice at home: “Robert gave Richard a rap in the ribs for roasting the rabbit so rare.”
In class a few days later, the teacher asked the boy to recite the sentence out loud.
The boy nervously eyed his classmates – many of them already laughing at him – then replied, “Bob gave Dick a poke in the side because the bunny wasn’t cooked enough.”

A teacher was teaching the colors and their flavors using lollipops. She distributed purple lollipops to her class and asked, “What flavor is purple?”
The class responded, “Grape.”
She continued this with yellow, green, orange and red. The last lollipops distributed were a light yellow-brown (honey flavored). The children were unable to identify the flavor. Teacher suggested, as a clue to its name, “It’s what your mother calls your father when he leaves for work in the morning.”
Little Mary shouted, “Spit it out quick! It’s a butthead!”

The English teacher’s husband walked in and caught his wife sleeping with a young co-ed. He said, “Why, Susan, I’m surprised.” She bolted upright, pointed her finger and corrected him, “No. I am surprised. You are astonished.”



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